Friday, April 29, 2005

Even Little Vader Hates Star Wars

It turns out that not only did the fans hate the little kid in "Phantom Menace," so did the little kid. Jake Lloyd, the boy who was given such classic lines as "yippeee!!" has done his first interview in six years for Turns out he's been in seclusion all these years, trying to recover from the humiliation of that movie. And he's sixteen! Can you believe it's been that long? How time flies.

We also have an exclusive interview with the other most hated character in Star Wars, Jar Jar Binks.

Q: What drove you into hiding?
A: Oh, meesa be gettin' death threats from muy-muy fans. Meesa seen cartoon where Jar Jar get chopped up. Meesa no like it, so meesa sayin' bye-bye. Jar Jar bein' in college for few years, thinkin' on Art History major. Meesa also been doin' few independent films, plays off-Broadway, and commercials overseas.

Q: How have you coped with the criticism?
A: It'sa bein' hard on Jar Jar. So many people be hatin' Jar Jar. Meesa be seein' all dat, meesa wanna bury head in da sand. Jar Jar even get into the prescription pain medication. Dat be makin' Jar Jar all crazy up in head for long time, but Boss be doin' intervention last year. Meesa go into rehab, get cleaned up. Meesa also be goin' to therapy, makin' muy-muy progress on self-actualization. Jar Jar be knowin' it not Jar Jar people be hatin'. It be character on film. Meesa be knowin' his limits now, learn to love Jar Jar first.

Q: Did you ever take some of the criticism to heart, try to improve on your character in the second film?
A: Me be wantin' good scripts, good lines. Meesa hire writer to help out wit' Attack of the Clones. Me wanna make subplot where Jar Jar be gettin' smart, become Jedi like little Annie. But Lucas, he no listenin'. He be puttin' in more scenes of me trippin' on bantha poodoo, hittin' head, stuff like dat. So I be askin' George Lucas, "cut me outta dere." Only have few scenes in Clones, havin' no scenes in third episode. Jar Jar outta dere.

Q: What will you be appearing in next?
A: Meesa gonna do Death of a Salesman at off-Broadway playhouse in September. Meesa also be in studio, got a new album comin' out wit' best buddies Eve and 50 Cent. But meesa be really wantin' to direct.
Categories: entertainment

1 comment:

Mauricem said...

Meesa like! Muy-Muy ha-ha-funny interview. Meesa like 50 Cent most.