Thursday, January 21, 2010

Lindsay Lohan: Unemployable

The child star whose career collapses once he or she reaches childhood is so common that it's become a Hollywood stereotype. However, one person has taken that failure to a whole new level: Lindsay Lohan. Sure, she's strung out on drugs and alcohol, but we've seen that before. Sure, she's known more for partying in clubs than acting, but we've also seen that before. Even the fact that she hasn't had a movie or TV role in years isn't news. What is news is that she is now literally unemployable.

Let's say you want to make a movie with Lindsay Lohan...for some reason. In order to make a movie, you need to get insurance. That will kill any hope of Lohan being in your movie, because her multiple car crashes and DUI arrests mean that no insurance company will cover her. The last person who took a chance on Lohan was Rick Schwartz, the producer of the movie Labor Pains, and he had to beg every insurance company in Hollywood before he found one who would insure Lohan. And Labor Pains ended up going straight to cable (ABC Family, for some reason) and home video, so it's unlikely another producer will go to that much trouble. At this rate, the best thing she could do for her career would be suicide. She should be taking notes on Robert Downey Jr. to see how to revive her career.

1 comment:

Maurice Mitchell said...

Who knew her career would be killed by an insurance agent? You wouldn't think in a world where people could insure their lips, breasts, but or even tan that it would be hard to get a policy. Hollywood is a wierd place.