Saturday, October 11, 2003

Giving Monkeys Migraines


Welcome to the home of Monkey Migraine. We've been giving monkeys migraines for 200 years and now you can, too! To make your official Monkey Migraine Migrainizer, all you need is the following:

1 live monkey (preferably pygmy marmoset)
10 feet of rope
1 wooden hammer
2 feet of tin foil
4 thumbtacks
1 tube of glue

First, tie up the monkey in a cage or chair with the rope. Then, take your wooden hammer and wrap it in the tinfoil. Glue the foil on firmly. Place the thumbtacks on the head of the hammer and glue them down. Wait two hours until the glue is dry. Take the hammer firmly in your right hand and hit the monkey's head with the hammer fifteen times. This should give him a really bad headache. Continue this every day until the monkey has a full-blown migraine. Simple and easy! If you can't find a monkey, then a rodeo clown can be substituted.
Categories: misc

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